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The Downstairs Maid Page 41
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‘Very happy,’ Lizzie replied and hugged him. ‘I’m so glad you could get back for the wedding, Nicolas darling. You’ve been away such a long time. I’ve missed you.’
‘You don’t need me now,’ he teased. ‘You have your Sir Arthur and soon you’ll be Lady Jones.’
Lizzie had opened her parcel, exclaiming over the beautiful silver bangle. ‘This is wonderful,’ she said and clasped it on her arm. ‘Arthur has given me so much but I love this … I truly do.’
‘Well, I’ll leave you to finish getting ready,’ Nicolas said. Then he said, ‘I suppose you don’t know where Emily went, do you?’
‘Emily Johnson?’ Lizzie looked at him, a little surprised. ‘Didn’t I tell you about her husband?’
‘Yes, you told me he’d died. You thought she would be running the shop in Ely, but it is a hairdressing salon now.’
‘Oh yes, I suppose I did think that at the time – she changed her mind so much. First it was the shop and then she wanted to join a voluntary service in London – in the end she went off to live with her mother in a pub in Ely. I think it does quite well. Arthur says he had a lunch there one Thursday and it was good – but of course I haven’t been there …’
Nicolas raised his eyes and Lizzie flushed. ‘I thought you were friends?’
‘Yes, we are. I invited her to my wedding. She sent me a piece of beautiful old lace as a gift, but told me she couldn’t spare the time to come. I was a bit hurt actually but … I suppose she thought I’d been avoiding her. You know what Mama would say if I visited her at a pub, Nicolas. She didn’t approve when Emily lived on Arthur’s estate, but Granny supported me – and she certainly doesn’t approve of Emily working in a public house. She might have had her old job back here if she’d asked …’
‘Perhaps she had good reason for doing what she does?’
‘Perhaps …’ Lizzie pulled a face at him. ‘Don’t be cross with me, Nicolas. I’m very fond of Emily, you know I am – but well, I don’t think I should like to visit a public house. It probably smells awful.’
Nicolas nodded his understanding. Lizzie could not help her upbringing. She’d been a bit of a rebel for a while, but now she was to marry a respectable man and she’d reverted to her class. A girl like her wouldn’t normally visit a public house and, if Emily had turned down the invitation to her wedding, perhaps it was for the best. For a time their worlds had come together, but now they’d drifted apart and perhaps both were content in their own way.
And in a way he’d been just as bad, because he hadn’t spoken out that day when he’d met Emily at the hospital. He’d hinted at his feelings, but he hadn’t told Emily he loved her – and he hadn’t asked her to marry him, something he’d regretted a thousand times. If he’d asked she might have said yes …
Leaving his sister to dress for her wedding, Nicolas went down to the hall. He had time to go riding, because the ceremony was not until two-thirty that afternoon. Feeling restless, he walked down to the stable. He wasn’t sure what he’d hoped for when he’d been given leave for Lizzie’s wedding.
Knowing that Emily had married out of duty had lain on his conscience all this time. He shouldn’t have let her throw her life away. Nicolas had felt hurt and angry in turns; knowing that he wanted her, his jealousy had ground away at his insides. Only when his stint as a flying instructor was over and he was back in Belgium, flying his kite, had the image of her white face left him. Then he could recall her as she’d been when he’d held her in his arms after her father died; the funny things she said that made him smile, the scent of her hair and the desire that had swept through him – but she had chosen someone else.
He hadn’t actually asked her to be his wife, because he feared a quarrel with his family.
Nicolas cursed himself. He was, he knew, one of the fortunate ones. The young pilots he’d trained were now becoming old hands, those that survived – and other young recruits had been sent to take their place, some of them dying on their first sortie. He was considered to have a charmed life and perhaps he had – but it often felt empty to him.
He’d tried dating other girls, even taking one or two of them to bed – but still the memory of Emily’s eyes had stayed in his head.
Nicolas had hoped that he would see her again, just walk into the shop to buy something … he’d also hoped that she would no longer have that strange hold on his heart that he could not shake off. Lizzie might not be able to go to a public house, but Nicolas could – and he would, after the wedding.
Lizzie was a beautiful bride, just as he’d known she would be – as Amy would have been had she not chosen to run away with her lover the previous year. Nicolas felt a little sad that Amy had disgraced herself and her family … but today was not the time for regrets!
Nicolas watched as his sister took her vows and then walked back down the aisle on her husband’s arm. Outside, he threw confetti over them and joined with his family as the photographer had them all lined up for the official pictures. It took a long time for the photographs to be finished, because they had to wait for each pose to be perfect and then for the exposure, but in the end Lord Barton said they should leave for the reception. Some of the guests had modern automobiles; some were still using a horse and carriage. Nicolas took two of the bridesmaids in his open tourer.
Because the weather was so pleasant, he had the top down and the pretty girls giggled and laughed, enjoying the ride. One of them had blonde hair and large blue eyes. Nicolas was amused by the way she fluttered her lashes at him, hanging on his every word. She told him her name was Celine and she was eighteen. She had just left her finishing school and was preparing to join the ambulance service in London.
‘A lot of people think the war is almost over,’ she told Nicolas, ‘but Papa says there is a long way to go yet and he wants me to do something useful with the education he gave me – before I get married.’
Her eyelashes fluttered flirtatiously and Nicolas knew that she was telling him she was available for romance, if not marriage just yet. She amused him, because her chatter was so innocent and open that it reminded him of Emily when she’d first come to the manor.
Nicolas supposed Emily would have changed a great deal over the years. She’d been a widow for several months now and was running a successful business. If she’d wanted to see Nicolas, she could have written to him via Lizzie – but perhaps she had forgotten that night when just for one moment she’d been tempted to go away with him.
‘How long is your leave?’ Celine was asking. ‘I don’t have to join my unit for another week …’
Nicolas looked at the pretty young woman and smiled. The invitation in her eyes was clear now. ‘I have ten days,’ he said. ‘I was due leave, because I’d deferred it for Lizzie’s wedding – and now I have some time to myself.’
‘So do I,’ Celine said, her mouth soft and inviting. ‘Isn’t that a coincidence?’
Nicolas laughed. She was a very bold young woman and he liked her. She attached herself to his side when they reached the house and, when the dancing started, Nicolas felt obliged to ask her to dance. After that he had to dance with the other bridesmaid and some of Lizzie’s other friends, then with the bride herself and his mother and, finally, a very slow dance with Granny.
‘You look very well, Granny dear,’ he said, leading her to her seat afterwards. ‘I think you will miss Lizzie?’
‘Dreadfully, but don’t tell her so,’ Lady Prior said. ‘Jonathan’s wife is dull – and Helen and I don’t see eye to eye.’ She raised an eyebrow. ‘Tell me, Nicolas – when shall you oblige us and bring a bride to this house?’
‘I don’t think it would be fair until this show is over – do you?’
‘Surely it can’t go on much longer?’
‘Who knows?’ Nicolas squeezed her arm. ‘I shall wait until I’m no longer being shot at, dearest. I don’t want to make my bride a widow too soon …’
He frowned as he recalled that he’d meant to visit Emily after the we
dding, but somehow he’d got caught up in the celebrations and it was too late now. She would be tired after working long hours in that pub. He would drive to Ely in the morning and see if she would speak to him …
Chapter 46
Emily could scarcely recall a busier night at the pub. She’d made several lots of fresh sandwiches and the pastries she’d cooked earlier had run out ages ago. She’d tried out some relishes to go with the rolls, cheese and cold meats she put into her sandwiches and they had been selling well too. It would take her a while to feel certain but she thought she was going to make enough money to see her through the winter, when the pub was not as busy as this every night. In summer they had several tourists visiting; people came to see the cathedral and quite a few men came down for the fishing. Emily knew that if she wanted the extra money she could let out two rooms – at least during the summer, but she was reluctant to do it, because she was alone here with her brother. Occasionally, one of the customers would try to flirt with her but she never responded. She knew that other widows did take in lodgers, but some of them didn’t mind providing extras. Emily certainly wasn’t prepared to sleep with her lodgers.
She’d noticed a man looking round the pub. He seemed very interested in her and what she was doing. He’d asked about the food she provided, and whether she would consider giving her customers a cooked meal – and if she took lodgers. Was he trying it on? Somehow she felt there was something more behind his interest, and, just as the customers were leaving, he suddenly asked if he could speak to her about a private matter.
Emily hesitated, and picked up a tray of dirty glasses. ‘If you would come into the kitchen I can spare a few minutes …’
He nodded and followed her. Again, she noticed his eyes moving about the room, taking in its appearance.
‘You’ve made some changes here and in the bar. I think I may say that you have picked up the trade and improved it considerably. Is Mrs Carter here this evening?’
‘No, not this evening,’ Emily said, feeling uneasy though uncertain why. ‘You can speak to me in her place, Mr …?’
‘Steven Richards and you are Mrs Johnson, Mrs Carter’s daughter I understand. They tell me you are a widow?’
‘Yes.’ Her sense of unease increased. ‘What makes you ask, Mr Richards?’
‘As you know your lease is due to run out next month. The brewery was not intending to renew because we were not satisfied that the pub was being run properly on our last visit – but you have certainly improved it. I think I shall recommend that a new lease be offered after what I’ve seen this evening.’
Emily caught her breath. ‘You say the lease runs out next month – so I have three weeks before then?’
‘Yes.’ He frowned. ‘Do you not wish to be considered for a new lease?’
Emily looked at him. ‘That depends on how much it is, Mr Richards.’
‘Well, in view of the work you’ve done here and considering how much trade you’re doing … I would think we might consider a two-year lease on payment of a hundred pounds.’
‘A hundred …’ Emily’s heart sank. She had no chance of raising even a fraction of that money. Had Ma not taken everything when she ran off, Emily might have managed to sell enough to raise most of it – and there was her diamond pendant – but she couldn’t be sure how much she would get for that. Nor did she know if her trade would continue through the winter. Even if she sold all the things Pa had given her she might not manage to cover the lease – and then she would have nothing left. ‘I would need a little time. I’m not sure I can find that much.’
‘Ah, I see. I did hear that there had been a tragedy in your family. Mrs Carter isn’t around now, is she?’ He took her silence for confirmation. ‘I’m not sure the brewery could let a young woman of your age take on the lease … even if you had the money. Had Mrs Carter been here … the brewery does require the proprietor to be over twenty-five but perhaps …’
She knew that her case was hopeless. Just for a moment he’d seemed to offer a chance but Emily wasn’t old enough to run the pub even if she could somehow manage to get the hundred pounds.
‘It will take me a little time to clear my things …’
‘Yes, I dare say – well, you have the three weeks, Mrs Johnson. I shall not tell the brewery your secret in the circumstances. It is a pity Mrs Carter isn’t here. This place hasn’t been as well run in an age.’
‘If I could find the money … need you tell them at all?’
‘Mrs Carter would need to sign the lease.’ He looked regretful. ‘I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, especially after seeing what you’ve done here. Good evening, Mrs Johnson. If you should want to apply to the brewery in a few years I would recommend that you be given a try.’
Emily didn’t answer. She stared at him as he went out, feeling as if she’d been run over by a steam engine. Ma had taken so much more than the treasures Emily had loved; she’d taken her means of making her living.
So now what did she do? Once she’d paid her debts and arranged for her things to be moved, she would be out of a job once more. Tears stung her eyes. She dashed them away angrily. It wasn’t fair. Why did everything go wrong for her?
All she’d wanted was to take care of Jack and give him a future and now even that had been snatched away from her. Lifting her head, she went back into the bar, which was now almost empty. Remembering the filthy ruin she’d come to a few months earlier, she was angry that all her hard work had gone for nothing. It was just so unfair. She wanted to hit out at someone, scream or shout – but what was the point?
There was nothing more she could do for now. Even if she could raise enough money for the lease by selling her pendant, the brewery would refuse her the lease because she was too young.
Emily had no choice. She was going to have to move back to the cottage or store her things and move on …
Emily had hoped that in the morning things would look better, but in the cold light of daybreak, her future seemed bleak. She knew that she could find a job somewhere. They might give Emily her job back at the manor if she asked, but what would happen to Jack? She wouldn’t be allowed to keep her brother with her if she returned to service so that meant she had to look for a job elsewhere.
Alone, Emily could find work anywhere but with a young child in tow … It was going to be difficult. The last thing she wanted was to put Jack into the care of a stranger, but she couldn’t see an alternative. Here at the pub she’d been able to look after him herself, taking him out for some fresh air during the hours the pub was closed. Could she find work of a similar nature? Perhaps – but she would also need a place to live.
It hardly seemed worthwhile cleaning the pub, but Emily hated the smell first thing in the morning so she scrubbed the floors, cleaned the toilets and washed the tables down before starting to make food for the bar. As soon as her staff arrived, she went upstairs to feed her brother and tidy herself.
She was just preparing to go back downstairs when she heard a heavy tread on the stairs. Her spine became icy. Who would come up here without an invitation? Had Ma returned? Yet surely they were a man’s footsteps? Emily looked round for some kind of a weapon and picked up a heavy candlestick just as a knock sounded at her parlour door; the door opened and someone looked round.
‘Vera told me to come up – is it all right, Emily?’
Emily stared in disbelief. Tears started to her eyes but she struggled to hold them back as she saw him.
‘Nicolas …?’ she whispered and the pain and grief welled over. She’d thought she might never see him again, and the relief made her weak. She dashed the tears from her cheeks. ‘I’m so foolish. It’s just that everything has been so awful – and now you’re here …’
‘Emily, my darling …’ Nicolas strode towards her, taking her into his arms to hold her as she wept against his chest. The tears flowed, because Emily couldn’t stop them. ‘What is wrong? Won’t you tell me – please?’
Somehow, Emily managed to
control her emotions. She accepted his handkerchief and wiped her face. Sitting down in one of the old armchairs, she found the words flowing out of her. She told him about how she’d planned to open the shop but been too nervous to do it alone after Christopher died; she told him about coming here and finding her brother in a terrible state – and of all that had happened afterwards. She concluded with the brewery’s agent telling her the previous night that she had three weeks to leave the pub.
Raising her head, she found the strength to smile. ‘I’m sorry for being such a wet week, Nicolas. How are you? It’s a while since I heard from Lizzie, apart from the invitation to her wedding. I wondered if you would come home for it.’
‘She was a beautiful bride, but I have another nine days’ leave,’ he said. ‘Why didn’t you let me know things were difficult for you? You must have known I would help you.’
‘I was managing …’ Emily shook her head. ‘I know I could have my job back but it means I have to find someone to look after Jack.’
‘Jack is your brother?’
‘Yes …’ Emily hesitated, then, ‘He’s my mother’s child but we have different fathers. Ma had an affair with someone; it broke Pa’s heart. I should never have trusted her, but I had to do something for Jack.’
‘Yes, of course you did.’ Nicolas looked thoughtful. ‘Would you carry on with the pub if you could?’
‘Yes, I think so. I’ve built up the business and I can manage here. It would be much harder if I had to find lodgings that would take us both – and someone to look after him if I was at work.’
Nicolas took a deep breath, hesitated, then, ‘You could marry me and let me take care of you, Emily.’
She was too shocked to speak for a moment, her heart slamming against her chest like a bird trying to escape the bars of its cage. She allowed her eyes to look into his. Nicolas had been angry because she married Christopher. She’d thought she must have killed his love, but it seemed he still wanted her. Yet surely he wasn’t offering to marry her? It was impossible – he must know that?