Hetty's Secret War Read online

  ‘I could go to any brothel for that,’ Pierre replied. ‘I’ve been wanting to kiss you since we first met and you accused me of stealing your things.’

  ‘Well, you were,’ she said, but her eyes were bright with laughter. She had come to like Pierre these past weeks and he was right, the physical attraction was there between them, had been from the beginning. Her experience with Henri had taught her to be wary of giving her heart too easily; she had been hurt and she didn’t want that to happen again, but she knew that she wanted to go to bed with this man.

  ‘I sent some of the servants to look on the road for your pictures,’ Pierre told her ruefully. ‘I’m afraid there was nothing left of them but a few shreds of torn canvas. Everyone had trampled right over them.’

  ‘Possibly the best thing that could happen,’ Hetty said. ‘At least I still have my paints. I can do some work here – a few pictures of your chateau perhaps.’

  ‘That would please Grand-mère.’ His eyes darkened with passion as he bent his head towards her. ‘You haven’t said yes…’

  ‘But then again, I haven’t said no,’ Hetty said and reached up on tiptoe to kiss him. ‘Perhaps you ought to see if you can persuade me?’

  *

  Hetty lay looking up at the silken canopy of the four-poster bed while Pierre slept beside her. A little smile curved her mouth, for their lovemaking had been both pleasurable and satisfying. Pierre was a good lover, skilled and passionate – a better lover than Henri had ever been, because he had tried to please her before seeking his own release. Henri had thought only of himself. She realised that her first lover’s betrayal didn’t hurt any longer. She’d moved on, was stronger and more independent now that she’d learned to live for herself and not in a man’s shadow. No man would ever do that to her again.

  Hetty hadn’t known it was possible to feel quite such exquisite pleasure and she was glad that she had not refused Pierre. She didn’t believe that she was in love with him. From what she recalled of her first feelings for Henri they had been very different. Love made you afraid, excited, nervous; she’d gone on loving Henri despite his faults and the hurt he’d caused for a long time – but she wasn’t experiencing any of those emotions at the moment. Pierre had made her happy, as she had made him happy; it was a fleeting thing but something to be enjoyed.

  She gave a sigh of pleasure. She had quickly grown fond of Madame la Comtesse, and she enjoyed Pierre’s company. She had promised she would stay on for as long as possible, and she knew Kristina had found a safe haven, for Madame de Faubourg loved her. They were together much of the time; child and old woman, hand in hand in the gardens, enjoying the sunlit, peaceful days. The chateau had a timeless feel, as if life went on in the same way endlessly, passed by as the world rushed to chaos; as if by her strength of will alone the Comtesse could hold back change.

  If only it could stay this way forever, Hetty thought, knowing that it would not last indefinitely. The Germans would come and when they did… Madame talked of killing them, but Hetty was more wary. They could fight in secret ways, were already making plans to make sabotage attacks on German trains, but they could not hope to repel the Germans if they came to the chateau in force. They were, as Pierre said, only a few women, old men and boys.

  ‘What are you thinking?’ Pierre asked and kissed her neck.

  She had thought him asleep, but obviously she was wrong.

  ‘I was just thinking I should like to lie here with you forever.’

  ‘You are a siren, Hetty,’ he told her with a throaty chuckle. ‘In olden days you would have lured Grecian sailors to your island and kept them prisoner there.’

  ‘And what does that mean?’ she bristled.

  ‘It means that I agree with you. I wish I could stay here forever, just like this.’

  ‘But you can’t – because I’m going to do this!’

  Hetty laughed huskily and rolled him over onto his back, beginning to kiss his body, trailing her lips and tongue down from the hollow at his throat, past the narrow arrow of hair to the growing evidence of his need. She took him into her mouth, her teeth grazing the delicate flesh and making him cry out as his back arched in response to her teasing. Her tongue tantalised and aroused him further, bringing cries of pleasure from his lips. And then she was sitting astride him, arching her body over his, lowering herself slowly, oh, so slowly, onto his hard, throbbing shaft. She fit him like a moist, silken sheath, surrounding him in warmth, making him writhe with the pleasure of her tantalising movements. One moment she was bent over him, her firm taut breasts making tempting fodder for his eager mouth and tongue, then in the next moment she sat back, arching away from him as his hands moved down her slender body, then lifted her and brought her down on him hard.

  ‘Mon Dieu, Hetty!’ he gasped as his body shook with the force of his release. ‘I’ve never known anyone like you… never!’

  ‘You are a wonderful lover, Pierre,’ she repaid the compliment. ‘You have made me happy.’

  ‘I am glad,’ he said and pulled her close, burying his head in her breasts. She had her own perfume, a delicious fresh scent that mixed with the musk of her sex and was irresistible. ‘One day I should like you to be my wife.’

  Hetty gave a little chuckle. ‘I’m not an innocent virgin to be placated with offers of marriage, Pierre. You owe me nothing – this was an exchange of pleasure between a man and a woman, that’s all.’

  ‘You are a free spirit,’ Pierre said and seemed amused. ‘I do not offer out of guilt or conscience, ma chérie – but because I should like to keep you all for myself.’

  ‘We shall see,’ Hetty said and rolled away as he tried to grab her. ‘Enough for now, my impatient lover. I’m hungry. I want something to eat. Come, dress yourself. Your grandmother will be wanting her supper and she will wonder where we are.’

  ‘If I know anything, Grand-mère is well aware of where we are, Hetty. She has already told me that I would be a fool to waste my chances. I don’t know what it is about you, but she has taken to you as if you were her own. She told me that I should marry and produce an heir for the family – and I think she has you in mind.’

  ‘As I said, we shall see,’ Hetty said. ‘I am going to wash and dress – and I advise you to do the same…’ Marriage was something she was not yet ready to consider.

  Hetty was thoughtful as she left the bed. Pierre would return to the French army now. She would remain here with the Comtesse, but she would not be idle.

  *

  Georgie was on her knees weeding in the rose beds when she heard the telephone shrilling through the open French windows. She put her trowel down hastily and hurried inside, her heart racing. Would it be Ben? It was only a couple of weeks since they’d parted, but she was missing him terribly. He’d managed to ring three times, just for short periods, but he couldn’t tell her much, just that he loved her and missed her – but that was enough. She was hungry for the sound of his voice.

  ‘Georgie?’ Annabel’s voice came over the line. ‘I’ve managed to get you at last. This must be the tenth time I’ve rung you – have you been away?’

  ‘Yes, I did go to stay with a friend for a few days after Geoffrey went to back to school,’ Georgie said. ‘He enjoyed his few days with you and your family, Annabel. I only had a short break away myself. But I’ve been out a lot since I got back, because I found a job. I’ve been driving an ambulance, just a small emergency one, more like a converted van, really. Still, it does the job for wheelchairs and less urgent cases. I need to take a further driving test before I can graduate to a proper ambulance, but I think I shall go on with it. I didn’t realise how desperate they are for volunteers.’

  ‘Yes, that’s what Paul says. He was turned down by the army – a bit too old, they said. That rankled, I can tell you! But he found himself a job doing part-time driving for the Fire Service. So at the moment he does two nights on fire watch and three mornings a week driving for emergency services. And that’s besides a bit of training w
ith the Home Guard.’

  ‘Good gracious! How does he fit all that in with his own work?’

  ‘Oh, he manages,’ Annabel said and laughed. ‘He was determined to do something after they told him he was too old for active service. He’s only about ten years older than Ben, as you know.’

  ‘I think Ben only got in by the skin of his teeth,’ Georgie said, deliberately casual. ‘Have you heard from him recently?’

  ‘Not for some weeks,’ Annabel replied. ‘But Ben is like that. You don’t hear a word for ages and then get three phone calls in a week!’

  Georgie smiled to herself. She hadn’t done too badly then, though it wasn’t nearly enough. She changed the subject, not wanting to show undue interest in Ben.

  ‘I went to the pictures with a friend the other day. We saw Gone with the Wind again.’

  ‘Yes, I saw that with Beth the first time and cried buckets. Oh, I drove over to see Jessie yesterday,’ Annabel said.

  ‘How is she?’

  ‘You know Jessie, active, fit as a fiddle. I don’t think she’s aged a day in the last ten years. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for Harry. He isn’t much older than Jessie, but he looks drawn and tired. Jessie says he’s worried about the boys. He didn’t want either of them to go through a war; he had enough himself in the last one. As you know, Jonathan joined the Air Force last month, the second they would take him, and now Walter is talking of doing the same thing. He has another two years to wait, but the way things are going I can’t see this being over by then.’

  ‘Oh, please don’t say that. It’s too awful.’ She hated it that people she cared for were at risk because of a hateful war.

  ‘Let’s hope I’m wrong.’

  ‘Have you heard anything more from Beth?’ Georgie said, feeling she needed to change the subject once more. ‘Is she glad she married Drew?’

  ‘Oh, I think so. I haven’t heard anything since she rang to tell me that Drew had gone.’ Annabel sighed. ‘She didn’t sound too happy. I’m worried about her alone in London, Georgie. We keep hearing rumours about London being in for it one of these days, and I’ve asked her to think about coming home now that she can’t see Drew, but she says her work is important and she can’t let Arnold down.’

  ‘You know how stubborn she can be,’ Georgie said. ‘Besides, they said London would catch it at the beginning and it hasn’t happened yet. They seem to be concentrating more on the airfields and the ports than the city centres.’

  ‘Bad as that is, I would rather it stayed that way for Beth’s sake. Oh dear, that sounds awful, doesn’t it? Of course I don’t want anyone to be bombed! I hate this war.’

  ‘Don’t we all? I suppose you haven’t heard anything more of Hetty?’

  ‘No and I don’t really expect to, Georgie. Hetty let us know she is out of Paris, and she won’t bother trying to get another message out. She will either stay where she is until it’s over or come home – that’s if she can, which I doubt.’

  ‘I dare say it’s a bit late now,’ Georgie agreed, ‘though I suppose there are ways.’

  ‘Yes, perhaps, but Hetty isn’t likely to get that sort of priority.’

  ‘No, that’s reserved for a special breed of people – and we shouldn’t talk about that on the phone, or anywhere else come to that. You know what they say, keep your mouth shut for Britain.’

  ‘We aren’t likely to know any secrets, are we?’ Annabel laughed. ‘Oh, well, I just wanted to make sure you were all right. You can always visit again soon if you’re feeling a bit fed up.’

  ‘Yes, I know, thanks. I’m fine at the moment. Too busy to be lonely,’ Georgie said.

  It wasn’t quite true. She was lonely for Ben, but she couldn’t tell his sister that; it was their secret for the moment and it had to stay that way for everyone’s sake.

  ‘Well, that’s what I wanted to hear. I’m glad you’re feeling better, Georgie. I hope Beth will come and stay at Christmas if she can get leave. You might think about bringing Geoffrey and making it a family party?’

  ‘Yes, perhaps,’ Georgie said. ‘We’ll talk about it nearer the time, Annabel.’

  ‘Well, I shall have to go. Paul just came in and he will be wanting something to eat and a chat before he goes out again. He’s on fire watch this evening.’

  ‘Bye then.’

  Georgie sighed as she put down the phone. Annabel was a good friend and she didn’t like keeping secrets from her, but she could hardly tell her she was Ben’s lover, could she? She used the word lover in her own mind because she didn’t like the alternative.

  If only Ben had been given the desk job he’d expected to have when he’d joined up! He would have been able to telephone and to visit more often. Georgie pulled a wry face. She ought to know that life wasn’t like that. It had a habit of smacking you in the face just when you thought everything was fine.

  *

  Surely she couldn’t be pregnant! Beth came out of the bathroom, wiping her mouth, the horrid taste still on her tongue. That was the worst thing about living in lodgings, she thought as she saw her landlady’s husband glance at her curiously when they passed on the landing – there was no privacy!

  It wasn’t fair that she’d fallen for a baby so quickly, Beth thought. She felt a little resentful. They’d only made love a few times – and the first had been so awful. It had hurt so much! She hadn’t been able to stop herself shrinking away and giving a cry of pain, and then of course Drew had been wretched. He’d apologised over and over again, and that only made her feel worse.

  ‘I’m so sorry, darling,’ Drew kept saying. ‘I was impatient and you weren’t ready.’

  ‘It isn’t your fault, Drew. I was nervous, that’s all. It will be better next time.’

  She’d been a silly little virgin, of course, but she did love Drew so very much, and it had been easier the next time. Except that Drew had waited so long because he wanted to be sure she was ready that it had been over too soon. So he’d ended up apologising again. They’d got it more or less right after that, but just as they were beginning to relax with each other and enjoy themselves, Drew had had to leave.

  ‘I wish we could have longer together, darling. I hate leaving you.’

  ‘I wish you didn’t have to go, but we both know you do.’ Beth forced a smile.

  ‘What are you going to do now? Shall you stay in London or move back to the country? I would feel happier if I knew you were safe.’

  ‘I’m as safe here as anywhere.’

  ‘Mother would love to see you. I’m sure you could stay there until I come back if you wanted.’ His eyes seemed to plead with her on his parents’ behalf.

  ‘I shall write and thank your parents for sending me those pearls, of course.’ Beth avoided his eyes. She wasn’t sure why, but she was nervous of meeting his parents, though they had been perfectly sweet to her over the hasty wedding.

  Drew’s surprise present had been a wonderful pearl necklace. Beth had never seen any as fine and she’d known before he told her that they were family heirlooms.

  ‘Mother said I should have them when I told her we were getting married,’ Drew confided, looking proud and pleased. He’d gone to the bank to fetch them before meeting Beth that afternoon. ‘I know she will love you, Beth. You must promise to visit when you have time.’

  ‘Yes, of course I will,’ Beth had agreed, though it was something she was reluctant to do. It wouldn’t have been so bad if Drew had taken her himself, but to go on her own would seem an intrusion. ‘But I can’t take more time off yet. Arnold relies on me.’

  ‘I almost wish I hadn’t got you that job.’ Drew had looked at her with a hint of jealousy. ‘Don’t get too close to him while I’m away.’

  Beth had stared in astonishment. Surely he couldn’t mean that? ‘You can’t imagine I would think of Arnold in that way? No, Drew, that’s too silly!’ She went into a peal of laughter. ‘He’s at least twelve years older than me for a start. Besides, he’s not my type. You can’t think
either of us would be interested? Arnold is a confirmed bachelor.’

  ‘No, he isn’t actually,’ Drew had said, wrinkling his brow. ‘He was married for a brief time when he was about your age. His wife died of a lung infection a few months later.’

  ‘Oh, Drew!’ Beth was shocked, her eyes opening in dismay. ‘That’s terrible. I had no idea. He never mentions her – but then, he never speaks of his private life at all. I thought he was only interested in his work.’

  ‘I expect that’s why. He went very quiet after her death, as you might imagine. Mother said it changed him completely. Before that he was a rather happy-go-lucky type apparently.’

  ‘Losing someone they loved would change anyone.’

  ‘Yes, you’re right. I should hate to lose you, Beth.’

  Beth had simply put her arms around Drew and kissed him. They’d made love again and it had been the best of all. She thought now that it might have been when her child was conceived. Always supposing that she was pregnant, of course. The sickness might be caused by something she’d eaten. She would have to see a doctor as soon as she could manage to make an appointment.

  Suddenly the wail of an air raid siren sent a chill down Beth’s spine. Surely they weren’t going to be bombed at this hour of the morning?

  For the past several nights, the sirens and bombing had become a part of all their lives. London was really catching it now. She hoped Drew didn’t know it was happening because he would worry about her.

  ‘You’d better come down to the shelter, Mrs Bryant,’ her landlady called up to her. ‘It might be a false alarm, but you never know.’